dear krystal

dear 15-year-old self,

hello! It’s me from twelve years in the future. I know there are a lot of things you probably want to know, so here are some quick tidbits:

• you will not have a date to the prom (sorry but it’s totally your fault)
• your mixed cds are amazing
• you will change the way you write capital I’s (and it will save your wrist so much pain when you start journaling daily at 17)
• the first time you’ll experience true failure is when you take your drivers test
• your sophomore English teacher will be your coworker
• oh yeah, you become an English teacher (hah!)
  • and get this: YOU TEACH AT SUNNYSIDE
  • (I know, you’re freaking out. don’t worry. it makes a HUGE shift and you’re going to love it)
• your friendships ebb and flow. let them. sometimes they last for a season and that’s okay
• you become brave
• you never ever ever like The Scarlet Letter
  • also: I know I shouldn’t instruct you to change your life based on how it might impact mine, but seriously. do not read Heart of Darkness. Just Sparknotes the whole thing. You’ll do it again in college and you’ll feel dumb. Don’t worry. You’re not. It’s just a dumb book.
• you don’t get kissed until you’re 27 (sorry!!) but even though it’s not that great of a kiss, it’s still better than kissing any of those other guys that broke your heart.

That last one was burning in your mind, wasn’t it? It probably seems stupid to wait so many years for it, but the whole thing makes for a great story. In a spectacularly Krystal way, you mess it up, but redeem it because your awkwardness is so stinkin’ endearing.

But alas, this letter is not about boys. This letter is about you. You, my darling, will become a great adventurer. It’s probably not the kind of adventurer you have in your head, but it’s so much better. You really do become brave. Maybe you won’t think through everything as thoroughly as you should, but you keep jumping. You keep searching. It’s better to have tried and failed than to not have tried at all. (But maybe don’t use this advice for everything, like trying to reach out to those dumb boys that break your heart. Just let the relationship fall to pieces and don’t try to tape it back together. It’s not worth it.)

But adventure? You breathe it. You take solo trips—flying in airplanes to new places, renting cars just so you can explore on your own terms. You finally get a nice camera and take photos. You love with your whole heart and you learn to build your own tribe of people you lean on for support.

Trust me, you’re going to feel like an inconvenience a lot of the time. You’re going to feel like you can’t bother your friends when you’re hurting. Don’t be so hard on yourself, my dear. They’re your friends. You need them and because they love you, they will show up. And if they don’t, go back to that list above. You don’t need everyone to stay your best friend. You’ve got a spectacular family of people you’ve chosen. They choose you too. And it is amazing.

My advice? Don’t think small. Dream big. Write that story. Apply for that scholarship. Be young and wild and free. You’re going to love growing up.

But also remember. Life gets a little lonely sometimes. Don’t worry, somebody will give you the best piece of advice: you’ll always make another friend. Believe that. Because you do. And they will listen and laugh and love you so dearly; it’ll be the comfort you never knew you needed.

Dream big, brave girl. Be sought after. It’s all going to work out in the end.

Stay gold,

Krystal

you at 15

you at 27